Despite of knowing that we all do it. We compare ourselves almost daily with other people, whoever it may be – friends, family, colleague, roommate, celebrity etc. We compare everything from the lifestyle to the way they breathe.
Why do we compare ourselves with others?
Because we love to measure how much we have achieved. If you are said to cut a box full of vegetables, you’ll look into the box once in a while to see how much is left. It is an indication that you have progressed up to a level. The same way we see everything.
When we can relate to someone or when we idolize someone we tend to compare with them. Let’s say you see an actor who looks similar to you. Immediately you’d be comparing you and the actor.
To look like that I need to become more fit
It is healthy, as far as it motivates you to be better. When it turns into envy you are prone to anxiety and depression.
Effects of comparing yourself to others
- You’ll have a lot of psychological effects like anxiety, depression, obtrusive thoughts and loads of worry which you actually don’t want.
- At a stage you’ll be compelled to compare yourself with others, which Paul Angone termed as Obsessive Comparison Disorder.
Don’t worry though, we can come over that before it becomes that huge.
How to stop comparing yourself to others?
First step to stop comparing yourself is to realise how much blessed you are. When you are in the comparison mode all you see is shiny, beautiful things other side and complete crap on your side.
Maybe it’s just the dust that is covering the gold. You just have to clean for your gold to shine.Tweet
And one way to do that is start a gratitude journal or just a gratitude log page in your daily journal.
Observe everything you have. Let it be the trophy you won in your second grade or that you had a hearty laugh the day before. Be grateful for that and write it down.
Life is not a competition
It never was and it never should be. Life is more of a journey. But for some reason it has been portrayed as a competition. And one of the reason was to gain motivation.
If you are aspiring to do something, you should be drawing out inspiration and ideas from who had already done similar things.
But most of us tend to get triggered by it and feel like we lost a race. But we forget, it was never a race. Every person runs in a different track with different hurdles and can’t simply be compared with each other.
Appearances are deceptive
You may look at a person and think
How successful he is? Why am I not like that?
The same person maybe looking at you and thinking
How happy she is? Why am I not like that?
If people had the power to read minds of others they would know how much better their life is. Unfortunately we don’t. But just remember that what we see is just the tip of the iceberg.
Limit social media
Those I HAVE THE PERFECT LIFE pictures that you see on social media, do affect your life. They just don’t show the behind the scenes. And when you see the behind the scenes, you realise that their life is more or less the same as yours. Don’t believe me?
Despite knowing this we have a tough time not to compare with those pictures. So just limit your social media use. That would help.
Stop negative self talk
It’s dangerous. Self-destructive. Never ever talk bad about yourself. Your brain hears everything you say and it thinks you mean it, even if you don’t.
And brain reacts the same way. When you say that you are useless the brain would probably be like “Okay! This person is an useless one. He should be sad about this. Emotions! Go make him sad.” And you would be sad which would affect your productivity and whole life in turn. Stop negative self talk now!
Avoid the triggers
Try to avoid almost everything that triggers you. Is it that friend who keeps on boasting about outfits? Is it a blogger who portrays as if having the best life?
Maybe they aren’t lying, but if it triggers you to compare yourself with them, try to avoid it any cost.
Be happy for other’s success
This cost me a friendship to learn. I don’t want that to happen with you. Just because another person is successful doesn’t mean you are a failure.
Switch yourself to the abundance mindset.
Success is not like a room, that it only can hold only a particular number of people. It’s much like the universe. It can hold everyone.Tweet
So if that person is successful that never deters the chance of you being successful. By celebrating their success you accept that fact, also the positive mindset gives a boost to your life and success rate. It’s a win win situation.
What else do you think can be done to stop comparison? Let me know in the comments below ♡
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