Being confident is no complicated art. That much is for sure.
It is being you. It is being whatever you want to be like in your own comfortable way.
Is it easy to be confident?
Going from a caterpillar that is confined into its own cocoon to a colourful butterfly that flies according to its will take some time
Merely stating the fact
But if you really want to become that confident person, breaking all the barriers, you’ll have to do the CTRL+C, CTRL+V.
Yep, copy and paste. Not literally. You need to copy (to be read as adapt) the habits of successful people and paste (implement) it into your life.
So, in this post I’ll share with you what highly confident people do differently to be, you know, a confident person.
Taking decisions can be pretty much stressful. It can freak the hell out of you.
Especially when you aren’t sure about yourself. Your brain and heart will ask you a thousand questions. What if this goes wrong? What if everyone thinks I know nothing? If it goes miserable, will it be the end of everything? Do I have the proof that this will work?
That will keep on going.
Let go of that feeling. Take a deep breath and shake yourself off of those thoughts.
- Have I done the research?
- Do I have all the facts right?
- Have I followed all the steps correctly?
Check, check and check. Yay! Go on take that decision. As far as you have done the preparation and you know you are right, you can take a decision without second thought. That’s what confident people do.
Own up your mistakes
Now that we spoke about decisions, this one goes hand in hand with that.
Let’s say you took the decision. Yes, you did your research, your facts were right and you followed the steps but… something went wrong and it all ended up wrong.
Now what will you do?
- Go dig a hole and hide in there
- Panic and start crying/shouting
- Search frantically for a reason to blame someone else.
If you choose or used to choose any of the above, you need to grow up. Only those who lack confidence do those things.
Confident people on the other hand, own up their mistake and search for solutions. They know that mistakes are integral part of any process. There will be a down just so that you can have an up.
I want you to realize the same. In the past, you have committed a lot of mistakes and yet here you are, doing whatever you are doing. Mistakes are never fullstops, but they are commas that help you continue.
So yeah, if at all you make a mistake accept you did that, apologize and find a way to fix that. That’s what confident people do and that’s what you should do to become confident.
Seek advice when you need
Confident people aren’t ashamed of asking advice from the experienced. They accept the fact that not everyone knows everything.
There is nothing to be to ashamed. As Confucius said:
Asking questions are going to enlighten you. Curious people with lot of questions are the ones who end up having a lot of questions. So don’t feel shy to ask questions and seek advice. You never know the answer for that question maybe the one that will push you into a high level.
Not only celebrating, but also helping others towards success, adoring successful people are common traits of confident people.
They don’t feel jealous about others’ success. They know that the story of every person is completely different from each other and that one or the other day they too will reach that stage. They wholeheartedly celebrate and congratulate others when they succeed.
Even if you haven’t done this earlier, try doing this once and this act when done wholeheartedly gives you an amazing feeling that will boost up your confidence more. It’s like a circle.
Stop comparing yourself to others
As we spoke about celebrating others’ success, this should also be spoken about. The thing that stops us from celebrating others is this: Comparing yourself to others.
When someone else has achieved something, we immediately compare ourselves with them. “Oh my god! He/She has achieved so and so, but here I am eating chips, and sitting simply.”
I used to do that a lot when I started launched my first blog (which is no more active). The funny thing is, I used to do compare myself, an upstart with only a couple of posts, to pro bloggers who is there in this field for five years and ten years.
Do you know what that did to me? Instead of focusing on me, I started focusing on them. They were going ahead and I was standing at the same place and wondering why I wasn’t there. That’s what happens when you compare yourself to someone else.
It’s like standing still in a running race and wondering why everyone else is ahead of you.
So just stop comparing yourself to others and start focusing on yourself, that’s what confident people do.
Have you ever felt this urge to tell everything you know to others before they can tell their ideas? Nope?
Congratulations! You are one step ahead in confidence.
Yes! Confident people never feel the urge to tell people what they know. Because they are confident, obviously, that their ideas are good and unique. Their ideas can be told even at the last few moments, but that will make a effect. Because as we saw in the first point, they have done their research right, they have their facts right and they have followed all the steps correctly.
What they do instead is they listen with all their focus. No, I don’t mean just sitting there looking at the person and speaking something else. They really do listen, they take whatever is valuable to them, they give feedback to the speaker (because they celebrate others) and finally bring in their ideas.
So next time you have the urge to speak before anyone else in the room, unless you are making an announcement, control it and listen.
After all the listening, when your turn comes, your speech should be assertive. That is, your speech should be so good to make a difference.
What it should be:
- This will be the best way to do this.
- Doing this will increase our level of success
What it shouldn’t be:
- There is this way to do this, but I might be wrong
- In my opinion, this may lead us to success.
Playing safe isn’t what confident people do. They say what is right, because they know what is right.
But yes, being assertive and ordering people are two different things. Assertive sentences make people want to do what you say. But orders are like forcing people to do something, whether they like it or not.
Know the difference and that’s what will make you a confident person.
The looks and manners
Finally, comes the good looks, body language and the way you speak.
You should be satisfied with yourself to be confident.
So to feel confident, you need dress the way you love, as far as that doesn’t break the dress code, wherever you are going to go. You should feel confident about your dressings.
Next comes the body language. You are not going to look or feel confident if you are gonna stand there slouching with an indifferent look. Stand up straight with bright welcoming eyes and a wide smile. You’ll feel confidence tap into you.
The way you speak: There’s always a difference between,
“Hello! How are you doing?”
See the difference? The way you speak influences a great deal in your confidence.
In general, confident people don’t live for others. They don’t try to impress, they express.
Being confident isn’t something that could be faked. Yes it can be, upto some extent, but that isn’t how it works. Being confident is not a coat to wear it when you need it immediately. It is a lifestyle. You need to become it.
And becoming confident is all about the little habits that are different from others, so that you stand out.
Which one of the above habits do you think is most important to becoming a confident person?
Let me know in the comments below!
A total of 30+ printables that make it possible for you to make life look like a cakewalk. isn’t that the dream? <3