How to control your emotions?

Emotions can play like a pro with us. We all would’ve had that one moment when we were unable to control our emotions. Let that be over spending out of happiness or lashing out on someone who did nothing. And yes, we all regret it.

There may also be situations where you really wanted to control your emotions, but it nevertheless burst out. So what do we do in those situations? Scroll down to find out

Breathe

Yes, I know this is a basic thing that anyone you run into can say. But the most basic things can be the most important things. Whenever you feel your emotions bubbling up, just inhale deeply and then exhale slowly.

When angry count to ten before you speak, if very angry count to a hundred
-Thomas Jefferson

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You might have wanted to snap at someone. But wait, inhale deeply and exhale slowly. Now think do you want to snap at the person. Most probably not.
This also goes before throwing a party that will be too expensive that you’ll regret later.

Action step: Breathe deep everytime you get angry. Sometimes you’ll forget and burst out in the beginning but eventually you’ll get used to it.

Consciously change them

Let’s say you run into the person you hate the most and the feeling is mutual. The person insults you or mocks you or does something to provoke you. Now the emotional voice in your head will be like, “Come on I say, punch straight in the nose. That’s how you repay.” When you realise you feel like punching, just talk back to your head “Lol no! He/She isn’t worth it.” and move.

It’s important you reply back to that emotional voice in your head. By changing the negative thoughts to positive regularly, the emotional voice will back off and a sensible voice will overtake it. So the next time when someone mocks you, the voice in your head will straight away say “Lol! Not worth it.”

This also applies when you are sitting alone and you think of taking revenge or something similar.

Action step: When you realise you are thinking something. Process what you were thinking. If there is something negative, say the opposite of that negative thought

Watch out for triggers

You should be aware what triggers you. In the above case we discussed, it’s the person you hate. Notice when your emotions bubbles up uncontrollably and try to limit or avoid them. Identifying emotional triggers is the key point to master the art of controlling emotions

For instance, I love reading books that aren’t academic. My happiness bursts out uncontrollably at the mere sight of them. I am so into them, that a glance on a book and I won’t put them aside until I finished them. This really damaged my grades when I was in school. So I had to pack up all the books in my home, uninstall all the e-readers in my phone except for one single book. (Of course I can’t survive otherwise :p)

This made sure that my happiness doesn’t burst out, but it just raises high and then I get reminded I have only this one so it comes down to safety level.

So when you take care of what triggers your emotions,emotions come into your control automatically

Action step: Make a list of what triggers emotional outburst

Mood boosters

Whenever you feel a little down make it a ritual to immediately boost your mood back to normal. Because feeling a little down has a huge chance of transforming into a explosion of emotion. So if you already know the one thing that makes you happy, do that. In case if you don’t try the following:

1. In a paper, write down a scenario that would make you really happy. And read it when you feel happy. Tear it, write another scenario for another time.
2. If you could do better with pictures. Prepare a scrapbook with all the pictures that make you smile and use it.
3. You can also make a joy box, filled with things, pictures, letters and whatever that makes you happy.

Action step: Make a list of things that make you happy and use it for preparing scrapbook/joybox

Smile

In fact make it a subconscious activity.
You’d have heard the good old saying,

Smile is a curve that set things straight.

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Well, it is true. The more you smile, the more amazing your day is. You don’t need to wear a wide smile and come around. Just a slight smile, like the one you’d have when meditating. Smile has the talent to trick your brain into happiness.

Action step: Whenever you realise you aren’t smiling, make sure you smile. Gradually, it’ll become a subconscious activity

Never bottle up

You can control your emotions in places where you have to. But you should never bottle up your emotions. Again it will burst out when you least expect. Always let go of your emotions in a healthy way.
Some popular ways of letting go of emotions is :

• Writing it down
• Talking about it to a friend
• Exercising to relieve stress
• Meditating
• Practicing mindfulness.

Action step: Prepare a list of things that helps you feel relaxed

Recap

1. Take a breathe before you react and think about the consequences
2. Consciously change your negative thoughts into positive thoughts
3. Know what your triggers are and avoid them
4. Boost your mood immediately when you feel low
5. Make smiling a subconscious activity
6. Find a healthy outlet for your emotions

What is the one thing that very often triggers your emotional outbursts? Comment below ♡